In order for communication between the souls and their loved ones to happen, there has to be at least two people. One of them has to be someone who has died and crossed over to what is often referred to as the Other Side, and who wants to communicate with someone they left behind. The second person is someone who wants, or at least is willing, to receive the messages, and acknowledge their importance and meaning.
Souls can start communicating with their loved ones they’ve left behind almost as soon as they cross over. Often they’ll do so just to let us know that they’re okay, and no longer in pain.
The first time I had dinner with Joey (whom I talked about in the Introduction) and his wife, as I was leaving I said to him, “Who’s Frank?”
“Who’s Frank?” he repeated. “Is this someone who died?”
“I’m assuming so,” I told him.
“I don’t know a Frank who died,” Joey said, starting to look a little worried. Keep in mind that he’s from Guam and not at all comfortable with this sort of thing. When I asked him if I could bring a friend with me for dinner, he was worried no one else would be able to see my “friend.”
“Okay,” I said. “Then who do you know by the name of Fran.”
He shook his head, and said, “No one.”
“Well then,” I pressed on, “who do you know with the “F” name, but I really want to say, “Frank.”
“I’m telling you,” Joey insisted, “I don’t know anyone by the name of Frank who died. My best friend is named Frank, but he’s still alive!”
I decided to let it go, thanked Joey and his wife, Sue, for the great meal and left.
The next day Joey received a phone call from his mother to let him know that his best friend, Frank, died the day before. Joey asked me what Frank wanted to say. I told him that I didn’t know, since the communication didn’t get that far.
You don’t have to be a medium in order to experience your loved ones communicating with you from beyond the veil. When a loved one passes away, they will communicate with you in small ways to let you know that they’re still around. It might be a thought that comes into your head out of nowhere that makes you think of your loved one. It may be familiar scent such as the cologne or perfume they wore when they were still with you.
Dreams are one of the most common ways that our loved ones let us know that they’re still with us. When a loved one visits you in a dream it seems more real than a typical dream does. It’s more vivid, and memorable. The experience stays with long after you wake up.
Brad, whom I met several years ago, told me about his sister, who was born with a number of physical disabilities. She had to wear leg braces, which caused her to have, what he called, “a Frankenstein walk.” She also had severe asthma attacks, and epileptic seizures.
One night, when Brad was still in his teens, his sister started seizing and having an asthma attack. The episode was so severe that her parents called for paramedics who immediately decided she had to go to the hospital. Brad’s mother and father told Brad and his brother to stay home. They told them that they would call later and let them know how she was doing.
Since this wasn’t his sister’s first trip to the hospital, Brad wasn’t too worried, so he went to bed and fell asleep. He had a dream in which he saw his sister no longer doing her “Frankenstein walk,” but running in a meadow with a large, beautiful, smile on her face. He woke up and knew she had died. A moment later the phone rang, confirming what he already knew.
Souls are energy, so one of the easiest ways for them to let us know that they’re around is with electricity. One of my favorite stories along these lines happened to a friend of mine, Traci. Traci’s parents had a stove with a digital clock that had stopped working. Her father was a scientist and a handyman, and he became more and more frustrated when he couldn’t fix the clock. His frustration and constant muttering about the clock grew to the point that it became a joke between Traci and her mother.
Traci’s father died from a sudden heart attack. He died without fixing the clock he had vowed to his wife he would fix. After Traci and her mother got home from the burial, Traci noticed something that made her scream for her mother. The clock, which her father couldn’t fix for more than two years, was working perfectly. “Do you think that my father fixed the clock?” Traci asked me later.
“Well,” I said, “he did promise your mother that one way or another he would fix the damned thing!” I think he killed two birds with one stone. He made the repair, and let them know he was still around.
Flickering lights is another way they’ll let us know that we aren’t alone, or forgotten. I remember one reading in which Chrissie, a young girl who took her life when she was only fifteen years old, told her mother to cancel the appointment her father made with the electrician. The lights going on and off the way they were for the past week were her way of having fun with them. Kathie, Chrissie’s mother, told me that her husband become so frustrated at what the lights were doing that he made an appointment for someone to come out and look at them just the day before. We both got a kick out of that one.
Music is another way that our loved ones reach out to us. How do you know if a song is a contact from the Other Side? I think one of the most common ways is that someone who has passed will suddenly pop into your head, and a song that reminds you of them comes on the radio a moment later.
One day I had an appointment to do a reading for a woman at my home office. I had a few minutes between my last appointment and hers, so I turned the radio on in my family room to help me relax. I heard a knock on my door. I opened it and invited her in. As soon as she walked in the door, she burst into tears. “How did you know?” she asked me.
“I’m sorry,” I replied. “How did I know what?”
“That this is my husband’s and my favorite song? How did you know to play it when I came here?”
Of course, I had no idea. Was it just a coincidence? Personally, I don’t think it was, and neither did she. Not for a moment. We both thought it was her husband’s way of saying “hello.”
Smells are another way our loved ones communicate with us to let us know they’re still around. I was doing a reading for a woman who lost her father. At one point, we could both smell cigar smoke. Her father, she told me, loved to smoke cigars. At the end of the session, we smelled a man’s cologne. She told me that she’d recognize the smell anywhere. It was the cologne her father wore every day until he became ill.
Denise, whose daughter Jasmine took her own life, contacted me to ask if I thought Jasmine was trying to communicate with her. One of Jasmine’s favorite things to do was to draw hearts, everywhere. It was sort of her personal “signature.”
One day, after a snow storm, Denise walked out to her car to see a perfectly drawn heart in the snow on the hood of her car. She sent me a picture of the heart. It took my breath away, and sent chills up and down my spine. “Do you think it was Jasmine?” she asked me.
“I’m sure it was,” I told Denise.
I could go on talking about how our loved ones reach out to us, but rather than doing that, I’d like to caution you against becoming dependent on “signs” from your loved ones. There’s a danger that rather than using them to move through your grief, you may become stuck, instead. In other words, not receiving signs does not mean that you’re not loved. It may mean just the opposite.
If there’s one message those on the Other Side want us to hear more than any other, it’s that they have not abandoned us. They will always be with us, especially when we can use their guidance. Just don’t make it a “full time job” for them.
As I said at the beginning of this chapter, you have to be open to receiving messages, and accepting them when they come. Most of the time, these attempts at communication from the souls are dismissed as flukes, or coincidences. It’s been my experience that when this happens often enough, the souls will inspire their loved ones to contact someone like me.
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